Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Dirty little secrets of bulldogs, and speaking of bulldogs, how about my SIL?

English Bulldogs are adorable. Everyone loves them. I can't take mine out without getting a crowd. The most popular questions? (1) how do you keep her fur so white? (2) how much does she weigh? (3) how old is she? (4) what does she eat?

Yes yes she is a joy, but being a bulldog (and this goes for all smashed face breeds) she doesnt have a lot of space to breathe. Air has got to leave her somehow and if not one end... so yes, to be in less delicately, she farts like a whore. The are loud, smelly rippers that progress in ferocity as she gets older. When she was a pup, they were the SBDs but then she started making noises which at first freaked her out, but now she is ambivalent to them. She also snores. She snores loud.

Speaking of bulldogs, there is my SIL. Basically I for some reason want to knit her something. Maybe because I want to get her something for X-Mas (yes I know the date) but she is so particular I thought knitting actually could be something to please her. Everyone says how difficult she is and how specific her tastes are. So much so, that even her mother doesn't want to venture an opinion on what she would or wouldn't like. So far this is all I have been able to gleen from her:
- she likes bold colors
- she's 30
- she has huge boobs (G cup) that she likes to squeeze into baby t's
- she's a book editor for an educational publishing house
- she lives in Ireland (hence, why knowledge of her is so limited)

The two scarf choices I have come up with are BRANCHING OUT done in burgandy Rowan Kidsilk haze. I thought it would be cute for her to wear to work. Or Midwest Moonlight done in Knit Picks Merino Style Hollyberry. She lives in a cold climate and this would be a great utilitarian piece.

The only toy my dog will play with is a tennis ball. I have bought her tons of other things, but she only likes tennis balls. She too is very specific.


Blogger Tammy said...

I would choose the Branching Out. No matter who it is once you show them the pattern they love it.

8:57 AM  
Blogger Zarah said...

I knit Midwest Moonlight about 2 months ago and I loved it (and love wearing it.) If you do decide to make it, I would make it a little narrower than the pattern calls -- mine just folds in half when I wear it.

4:25 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Branching Out is a nice pattern but I haven't checked out the other one.

Glad I could help with the sweater pattern and good luck with your Chibi hunt. The orange ones are new - smaller needles - so shouldn't be too hard to find.

8:42 AM  
Blogger Stacey said...

You posted a question on the secret pal blog about a noro sweater. I'm thinking that it might have been the Klaralund sweater. You can see it on the Knitting Gardens website: http://www.theknittinggarden.com/noro-cthcoll2.htm

They post great pictures of the patterns that are in the books...which is awesome because sometimes it's good to see them before you buy them!!! Hope that helps, let me know if you remember what the pattern was!

9:55 AM  

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